Palin and Trump's Race to the Bottom

Sarah Palin endorsing Donald Trump is a slam dunk for the nation when you think about it. This heel faction WWE tag team reeks of American machismo garnished with nonsensical charm and a dash of you betcha!

But Palin’s endorsement, besides being a gift to comedians and writers alike, is a complete slap in the face to the United State military and POW’s. Allow me to explain.

So you may remember last July when Donald Trump’s American Horror Story campaign began when he out of left field attacked Senator John McCain’s military record. More specifically, Trump claimed McCain who was captured, beaten and tortured for five and a half years in North Vietnam was in no shape or form, a hero. Trump went on to declare he only “likes people who weren’t captured.”

Trump was a real classy guy, even in the beginning.

Let’s not forget, Trump began his tough lipped journey to the top of the GOP mountain by casually calling out an American POW war hero who had the balls to spit in the face of Vietnamese torture. The man spent over two years of his life in solitary confinement and refused his own release until the rest of American POW’s were freed. Few people, let alone politicians are as heroic as Senator McCain. I don’t care which way your political compass points. McCain is a fucking war hero. Period. End of sentence. Fugettaboutit.

I mean to put in context how ludicrous Trump’s childish statements were, Senator McCain was a POW in Vietnam longer than Trump has been a Republican in the United State. Well, in this particular stint, anyway.

Fast forward to this past Tuesday where Trump dug into his metaphorical bag of dicks and pulled out what some mistook as a raggedy used Kochi The Anime Blowup Sex Doll. But it was worse. Far worse. And since Republican political consultants like Rick Wilson firmly believe Trump supporters are merely “childless single men who masturbate to anime,” Kochi would have been a sure hit. But instead they got something much more “bitter-clinging.” And in one of the most nonsensical ramblings anyone has heard since Rick Santorum’s frothy presidential campaign announcement last May, we were given the gift that keeps on giving : A Sarah Palin endorsement speech.

Now, one would think that Senator McCain’s biggest backer and supporter would be Palin, his old 2008 Presidential running mate from Mother Russia’s own backyard. McCain, after all, single-handedly resurrected Palin into the political stratosphere and consequently watched helplessly his presidential bid go black. And the terms of those conditions I thought were simply put and quite obvious. Once you go black, you never…you know. You never go back, damn it.

But Palin is back and in the process making a mockery of one of our greatest living war heroes and the military as a whole. By supporting Trump, she is basically giving a big Alaskan fuck you to the entire armed forces. By associating herself with Trump she is also agreeing with the egregious assertion that POW’s are cowards who don’t deserve honor, respect or praise. Like Trump, she must not like the captured ones either.

Palin did however ramble on some praise for “farm families, and teachers, and teamsters, and cops, and cooks and rockin’ rollers and holy rollers and those with the hands that rock the cradle.” I’m not sure exactly who or what holy rollers are. And who are the creepy hands that rock the cradle? Is it the holy rollers or the teamsters? What the hell was she talking about? Palin might have been three sheets to the wind when she gave that speech and I loved every second of it. I encourage every washed up has-been politician to sip back on grandmas old cough syrup before every speech. It makes the whole writing process that much more enjoyable.

But much like any other story starring Sarah Palin, you pretty much have to expect the unexpected. On Tuesday evening after her endorsement of the man who verbally donkey punched every living American POW, her 26 year old Iraq Veteran son Track was arrested and charged with “fourth-degree assault, fourth-degree misconduct involving a weapon and interfering with a report of domestic violence.”He allegedly abused his girlfriend who was reported as allegedly having bruising around her left eye.

Now, domestic violence is no joking matter. It is a serious issue where abusers must learn to take responsibility for their violent actions. Of course if you are a Palin, you will somehow, someway find a way to “thank Obama” for their degenerate mishaps.

Palin claimed that her son’s domestic violence issues stem from PTSD which is more common than you think and should be addressed with seriousness and sensitivity by doctors, councilors and a family support system. But don’t tell that to Sarah fucking Palin who spouted this bullshit in response Tuesday night, “It is now or never for the sake of America’s finest that we have a commander-in-chief who will respect them. They have to question if they’re respected anymore.”

So basically what she is saying in a nut shell is if President Obama respected her son more, he would not have decided to punch an innocent woman in the face. Considering Obama isn’t even the President who started the war that Track has PTSD from, perhaps Sarah is barking up the wrong tree. Maybe she has short term memory loss. Or maybe she has been drinking the Flint, Michigan tap water. But this particular case of PTSD would fall under the “Thanks Bush” category.

The irony is that anyone who is willing to stand for hours on end waiting to hear the philosophical quips of the likes of Loony Toons characters Sarah Palin and Donald Trump, is subjecting themselves to verbal torture. It seems that their hapless followers are POW's in their own sense.

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