Republicans Trump Dems in Political Set of Balls


There's the bottom of the barrel, there's the hole in the bottom of the barrel, and then there's the six feet of pig shit underneath the hole in the bottom of the barrel. This is the layer under which the American electorate is currently writhing and dying. The level of stupidity that we've embraced during this election cycle is so unreal and so humiliating, that recovery is unlikely. But, hey. Every society has to collapse eventually, right?

No part of my brain had ever even considered the possibility that the GOP could come up with a worse presidential candidate than George W. Bush. Not as a frontrunner, at least. He was a bumbling idiot, a war criminal, and managed to demolish just about every major alliance that America had around the globe with his profitable and contested invasion of Iraq. In 2009, I remember thinking “Well. At least that's fucking done with.” Then came Trump.

There's no real point in me going through the myriad of ways that Donald Trump is an unqualified and unpalatable choice for president. I'm not sure that any of his supporters can read words that are above a half a syllable anyway, and I don't want to preach to the choir. It's obvious why he's the humiliation of an entire country, and even his own party is scrambling away from him. But, honestly, I understand why he's had so much success in his campaign. This is supposed to be the year of the outsider. People are tired of the same old, status quo, bullshit. I'd even go as far as saying that the Republicans chose their candidate correctly in that regard. This kind of all or nothing mentality is something that Democrats could greatly benefit from, but we're getting toward the last sands in Bernie's hourglass. Right or wrong (they're wrong), Trump's little army did what the Dems were too scared to do. In fact, a Reuters poll just said that an unbelievable 46% of Hillary supporters only supported her to stop Trump. This was the mentality of Kerry's base in 2004, and we all saw how that went.

Trump's supporters aren't exactly the best and brightest, but they are the ballsiest. They didn't concern themselves with whether or not their candidate made any sense, had any ideas or qualifications, or used any words or phrases that exceeded a fourth grade level. They wanted him in, and they got him there. They punched people in the face who disagreed with them, touted their racism like the whole country was Alabama, and never allowed themselves to be swayed by logic or reason or statistics or facts. You may disagree with their views and their candidate choice, but they got their guy.

Granted, the pool of choices in the Republican camp was pretty shallow. The party planned on throwing their weight behind Jeb Bush, but seemed to miss the fact that he was god awful at campaigning, and even got pushed around at a damned Rotary dinner. Chris Christie looked and sounded like he was constantly in between heart attacks, Ben Carson was a sleepy lunatic, Kasich was forgettable, even while you were looking at him, and Ted Cruz has about the same appeal as a herpes outbreak. Romney should've gotten in on this one. He would've walked straight into the nomination.

Meanwhile, we have a guy on the left who's leading in almost every major poll when it comes to his electability against the sad reality that is a Trump contest, has a record that backs what he says, and has a plan to push for middle class growth that we can absolutely afford, despite the claims of his detractors. But we're not pushing him through the door. In a recent George Washington University poll, Clinton beat Trump by 3% (with a 3.1% margin of error), while Sanders annihilated him 51 to 40. But we're still afraid to make that push. It's uncomfortable and scary and it's a big leap into the unknown. But if Trump supporters can get that babbling human lampshade in, then we can do the same with Sanders. And if Hillary Clinton actually gave a flying shit about what's good for America, like she and her supporters say they do, she would concede tomorrow. She would do everything she could to help move the country forward, and no one with even a fraction of a conscience would risk a Trump presidency for the sake of their own ambition.

It's also worth noting that Sanders supporters are not likely to vote for Clinton. We've had a taste of a revolution at the polls, and we want more. But the likelihood of Clinton's base voting for Sanders is pretty high. They're going to vote for the Democratic nominee, whomever that may be, because they enjoy the comfort and security that comes with the party line. That's why they're Clinton supporters in the first place.

Long story short, we just got shown up on political bravery by a bunch of swamp dwelling morons who were conceived behind Mema's Possum Shack at the county fair, because their Pappy was so excited about his hog gettin' that blue ribbon at the livestock pavilion, that he just had to celebrate. We really should be embarrassed by that. We had a real shot at an honest politician holding that top seat, and we've almost lost our grip on it. We had to make sure that the other side of our own party knew just how much smarter and more logical we were, and it's likely to cost us dearly. I plan to support Sanders to the bitter end, because no one who didn't can ever bitch about dishonest politicians again.

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